How to Survive Betrayal

Companionship helps us rediscover life’s fleeting hope. That rare event of meeting someone who we just “click with” requires the right time and place. Once some months pass, the bond begins to develop. Then attachment begins to set in and that’s when betrayal hurts the most. How can we stop betrayal from destroying us?       

Hurt can cause us to doubt the goodness of others. The same person who helped lift your emotional burdens might have later tried to break you because they knew a lot about your weaknesses. I really believe that betrayal is more bitter than blood. Each one of us has faced betrayal in complex and different ways, so it is essential to let the mind fully heal after experiencing such trauma. Only a non qualified doctor would allow their patient to walk around with a broken leg. Healing requires not only patience, but hard work. 

We all have our reasons to get up each morning. The news is negative, negative, and negative. It’s hard to climb back up once some time is spent in that pit of despair. Nonstop fear of potential tragedy continues to persist. And when a formally trustworthy person goes against us, our whole, small world falls apart. The destruction of your world doesn’t have to involve your own deterioration.

At one point when we are left alone with our repetitive thoughts with no outside help, paranoia makes a comeback. It lets you know that everyone will eventually go against you. Why open up? The hatred is passionate, motivational. Such emotions can rot away our rationality, our senses. 

Fully suppressing anger that has resulted from betrayal can ruin anyone. If you are alone at home, scream it out. In all honesty, that kind of scene might look a bit insane yet it might be just what is needed to keep sanity. (Hopefully no one will mistake it for a murder scene.) Lots of stories online reveal that suppressed anger causes people to experience symptoms such as stress, discomfort, alongside forgetfulness. Anger can cause us to blind the senses and forget about the potential consequences of some spontaneous actions.  

During the time when the wounds are still fresh, complete forgiveness is impossible. I think to myself and say, “if only they could finally understand the pain they caused me.” Many hours are spent clarifying my intentions or maybe fixing my imaginary reputation, as an attempt at bringing forth some sort of justice. But they will never hear me and justice will likely not be served the way I want it. Eventually, the truth prevails. When the dust settles, it is necessary to eliminate the burden of betrayal. 

I once stumbled across a fantastic quote by author and poet C. JoyBell C. She writes, “You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.” One easiest way to harm yourself is to hold on to negative emotions. Some sleep might be lost or there might be lack of emotional control due to a bad conscience, which results in easier manipulation.  

Despite the very human hardships, it’s possible to move forward. In some years, our current worries will be completely irrelevant. There will come a time when the betrayal will be nothing more than a distant memory.

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